HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!The clock strikes 12, the ball drops, kisses and hugs are exchanged, and we celebrate a fresh year to live differently.
Diets. Gym Memberships. Packed Gym. Attending Church. Practicing Yoga. Forgiving others better. Living Healthier. Letting go of something that was holding you down.
These are just a few changes that each new year often brings. We as a society have embraced this “new year, new us” idea. We strive to be a new person, because the calendar has blessed us with a new year. When January arrives, we put the old year behind us and take in the new year. Unfortunately though, these resolutions that we tend to promise to ourselves don’t make it much past February. We cannot deny that piece of chocolate anymore, it has become too difficult to forgive easily, the treadmills open up at the gym, we slept in (we will go to church next week), being healthy is no fun, and it is much harder to let go than we thought.
It is easy to say that you are going to do something, but it takes doing something 7×7 times in order to make it a habit. They also say that it takes 21 days to make a change. These statistics set up most New Year’s resolutions to fail.
Counseling can be a great way for you to embrace a new and refreshed you and make long term changes that last longer than a few months into the new year.
A few years ago, I was in counseling for about two years. If you know me, I am not one to share very personal experiences. I tend to be a pretty private person. However, I share this for one purpose. I am not willing to ask something of others that I am not willing to do myself. If I encourage my clients to do something, I better be willing to live that out myself. Therefore, I would not be speaking of how highly I respect counseling and encourage everyone to try it, if I had not tried it out myself. Counseling can be very scary and daunting. It takes introspection, time, and strength. However, I can personally say that it forever changed my life and who I was, for the better. The pain that I felt during my time in counseling was some of the most pain that I have ever experienced. I was no longer suppressing the issues in my life that were causing me pain, but rather, I was embracing them and facing them head on. This was no small task and it took a lot of support to get through it. However, it completely saved me. It was the most vulnerable I have ever been and it was SCARY. I will forever be grateful to my counselor for sitting in sessions with me every week and supporting me through my life’s toughest challenges and pain. I was forever a changed person after those two years. I knew more about myself than I could have ever imagined and I’ve become much stronger in who I am and started believing in myself. It was the best “resolution” that I could have made for myself. It was a long term change that has allowed me to move on from life’s hurts and use them to empower me.
There are many reasons that some avoid counseling, I do not blame you – I did it myself for many years, before I gave it a shot again. I invested time into myself that I had never done before. I felt selfish for investing that time into myself, shouldn’t we be spending our money on something else, or saving it? It is sometimes difficult to put ourselves first, maybe it feels selfish to us, but it is important that we provide self-care and make ourselves a priority. Remember that you can’t be the best husband, wife, mother, father, friend and person without taking time for yourself every now and then.
I encourage you to take the risk and experience the same renewed self that I experienced.
What is your resolution and how can you make it a long-term change?
If you have any questions about counseling, please do not hesitate to contact me.
Brittany Wingfield, MS